hmmm, let me see now
insomnia and heart ache, isn't that how it usually goes?
and what about the melancholy and sad feelings
the feeling now is like the loyal dog that is kicked in it's
ass on a daily basis, or the loyal dog that is purposely left
behind at a parking lot or landfill, wandering, meandering
the cobwebs still build in the old headspace brainways.
a withering flower, a dried lake bed, a forest burnt to the ground
the heart is a boxer's punching bag, a target of their guns,
their bows and arrows, a vein to pull blood from, to pull my soul from
and oh boy do they ever, precision skilled shots, pinpoint accuracy.
syphoning out of me my essence, my life. damn it
what the hell is going on? who the fuck am i anymore?
what is left of me now? now that the vultures have picked my bones
in the corner a small man sings, his song hovers in the air
the subway is busy now, the crowds are restless
they stand in lines, in forms and groups of disarray
the thoughts of the people, if heard, would be deafening
a roar as loud as the engines of airliner jets
and then there's me, a trickling of thoughts,
blood oozing from a wound, the emotions seeping
out through the tears from my eyes
watching the crowds go by, go in and out of the subway trains
coming and going, there's only one train car im waiting for
and oh is my wait like an eternity, long and painful
slower than slow, i can only hope im still alive when that train arrives
well hell....i feel strange, that's all, just strange
the girl cats lays on a plastic bag, of which she's been playing with
for the past 30 minutes and as for the boy cat, he's probably sleeping
in a backroom somewhere, dreaming away
well, the new neighbors can sometimes be the noisy types
with the loud music, and banging and clanging
life is strange as hell, confusing, annoying, it's like static cling
i dont understand it, i cant relate to it, i think i think too much
i sometimes wonder what it would be like in this world if
we were given a choice of being born or not
i wonder how different this world would be,
how different history would be, if there would even be anything.
i sometimes find myself, while driving, trying to imagine what
the other drivers have been through, what their lives might be like
even while walking or just sitting, ill imagine these things
kind of dumb i suppose, or is it? i dont know. why do i think so much?
well, yes, the pain is still here, the tears still often flow from my eyes
even in my middle age. why'd you leave me behind like this?
im still dreaming, still holding on, still jumping through hoops
bending over backwards and then some
one day......one day......the sun will shine brightly on my
darkened shores once more and the birds will sing
i push on into eternity
