my petals

as my petals wither away
i sit and wonder what ever happened
what in the world happened?
where did it all go?
i stood so tall, higher than the other flowers in this garden
my petals were so colorful and bright and beautiful
my fragrance floated through the air all day and night
i was the first flower one would see walking by or walking out
into the garden where i stood
people would sit and watch and enjoy being around me
couples would smile and nod in understanding
now.....
only now.....
now, my petals wither away
my essence is waning
i lean to the side now
no longer tall and bright
now im noticed by my withering away
withering away
withering
colors fading, brightness dimming
just an after thought of what was
my petals.....my bright and colorful petals

this came to me while listening to this and imaging life in a different light:

those old shoes

those old shoes have seen many days, many days of rain and heat and cold
many days of rain soaked, mud coated, gutter water splashing days
those old shoes tired, jogged out, stretched out, with worn down soles
many days of tossed in the closet, tossed on the beach, kicked aside
those old shoes forgotten after being donated, left behind after it's shoelaces
are tied together and it's thrown over a power line to hang
many days of being overlooked by those that wear them, rarely thought of
as anything more than just a shoe.
those old comfortable shoes, or uncomfortable for some,
you see, those old shoes that we all wear are more than just shoes
they protect our feet, keep them warm in the cold days
or cool in the hot days, they give a look of style for some
we also over look how sometimes the people in our lives
we sometimes treat like that old pair of shoes
this old pair of shoes will always be loyal
this old pair of shoes will protect more than just your feet
this old pair of shoes will keep you warm on those cold days or
cool on those hot and warm days
this old pair of shoes will always listen and hear what you have to say
this old pair of shoes will be more than just shoes, if only you'd
let them be.
this old pair of shoes, time and time again, tossed aside.
rain soaked, or is it actually tear soaked
overlooked time and time again
sometimes someone actually does give them more than just a passing thought
sometimes someone holds onto them.
but this old pair of shoes.....
this old pair of shoes is only just me
laying there, bare
if only you'd see

about image

image? now hold on a minute and see where the real track lies....
image, like a veil laid out in front of eyes that don't really see.....
a veil in front of eyes that dont really care.
a sense of falsity, a sense of acceptance albeit fake and unreal
image, worrying about what someone that dont even care thinks
image, portraying an untruth that isn't really there
image, covering up lies that one wont let out
a veil laid out in front of eyes that dont really see
and probably wont ever see because they're not really looking at all

threw some more on it, not sure if it's done now
but whatwever

about loneliness

Charles Bukowski said:
"There is a loneliness in this world so great that you
can see it in the slow movements of the hands of a clock"

loneliness?  well, let me see, what does that even mean?
is it the sadness of not being with the one you love?
is it the sadness of not feeling loved anymore?
is it the sadness of not having someone next to you when you lie
down to go to sleep at night?
is it the emptiness of the room when only you are in it?
loneliness? well, let me see, what does that really mean?
is it the emptiness of a life void of a warming feeling?
is it the melancholy of the in between days?
is it the way that we gauge what status we have in society?
is it a sign of a lack of affluence or lack of good financial times?
is it the feeling from seeing a fancy car passing your old and used up car?
loneliness? well.....let me see.........
is it the solitary echos of sound of a person walking through a long hall
is it the sound that one must hear while on the moon?
is it the motion of a single feather floating through the wind?
is it the sight of looking in your passenger seat and not seeing the one you love there?
is it the beeping or ringing of your phone and not seeing the one you love there?
is it passing by a certain spot you used to share with the one you love and
triggering memories and feelings from them not being there too?
is it hearing that one song you both used to love and it hits you again that they're gone?
loneliness? well.....
is it the sound of  person talking to themselves when no one else is around?
is it the motion of an injured animal in the wilds of africa?
is it the heaviness of the heart when love is lost or is taken away?
is it the way a homeless person must feel after a night of rejection from begging for change?
is it the emptiness of a dance floor in a club before the people show up?
is it the sound of a cold, cold winter's night with no wind blowing?
is it the state of an old abandoned building or house after the inhabitants are long gone?
is it the feeling that comes from being rejected over and over again in life?
is it the feeling of inadequacy that comes from being left behind?
loneliness?
well.....i think we all know what that means.
of course some of us know what it means a great deal more than others do.
let's not forget what that means

disclaimer: i was merely quoting Bukowski to set a certain mood
for what i was trying to portray here, nothing more.
i do NOT own or claim any responsibility for the quote of him that i've
mentioned here.